Riggword Press Blog

Monday, March 9, 2009

Today marks the forty-seventh day of Cindy Sheehan’s anti-war protest against Barack Obama’s administration. Sheehan and her protest group “Know More, No War, Know Obama, No More”. Forty-seven days after taking over as Commander In Chief President Barack Obama has yet to fulfill his campaign promise to remove the troops from Iraq. A spokeswoman said that they are not satisfied with President Obama’s reducing the number of Humvees, tanks, artillery, and air power from Iraq due to environmental concerns only to leave the troops in Iraq as a deterrent to insurgents.

Secretary of State Jimmy Carter is waiting for Environmental Czar Al Gore to approve his flight to the Middle East to meet with leaders of Hamas in order learn to understand their opinion on the matter. Czar Gore’s Environmental team is still moving into their new offices in the Pentagon and no one was available for comment. Experts speculate that the Czar’s cabinet is relying on computer models to determine the environmental impact of such a flight. One staffer who remains anonymous stated, “Well ya know we have so much room here, and well yea those army guys are just being difficult, they ah just are moving kinda slow ya know, getten’ all of those stupid American flags out of there and all.

Riggword was unable to reach Barack or Vice President Michelle Obama. His staffers reported that he is addressing a joint session of Congress regarding his new $5 Billion spending plan to investigate the anti-matter/anti gravity machine. The money will come from higher taxes on oil products, pomegranate products, left-handers, left-wing bloggers, and any air flights over 100 miles. The money will be used for research for developing ideas on the thoughts, hopes, and dreams of collage and high school students on the subject. A creative writing contest will mark the beginning of the project.

Comments:

Chad:

What’s going on with this guy; I knew we couldn’t trust him. He’s just like all of them. I should have known when he went back on his pledge to take the Public funds for the election. I’m so disgusted!!!

Rowan:

Jeez Chad calm down, Obama has his reasons. You know he is way ahead of you and me and the media. He has the answer you just have to have faith.

MoonSong:

Chill dudes, it’s cool. Ah…wait a minute. Goina get back to you ah oh …….

Rowan:

Chad you have to stay on and listen to MoonSong. I met him at a CodePink rally. He knows what he is talking about on this issue.

Chad:

Yea, I was there. Isn’t he that air head student from Berkeley, I could never understand what he was saying he was so High all the time; what a druggie.

Windstar:

MoonSong is a professor you idiots. He’s the coolest; I got an incomplete from his ethics in talk radio class. He’ll give you the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Chad:

Arrrgh, now I have to listen to two stoners and a Pod person…..ok, this better be good.

Windstar:

Hey man don’t be dissin’ me bro’ I’ve been a supporter of Obama from the beginning. I sent him half of my student loan money three times. You know I have more in this than you do. My dad’s a conservative and I had to beg for extra beer and pizza money; idiot he never caught on. I got gassed at that anti-war rally up at Evergreen. I’m the real thing here. You old guys just don’t get Obama.

MoonSong:

Hey, back now. Got a little breeze through my pad and blew my blow off the table. Had to do a quick move to save my line. Now back to Obama and war and Sheehan, and ….wait a second……..sniff….ack…..awe..some! You see you should read between. Sheehan’s a wacked out Cheney drone. She was cool earlier but they got to her down in Texas. So, just drop the Sheehan stuff. Ah, ok…oops, I just… oh well. So, if you would just listen to the way Obama inflects his oh-well-what-the -heck tone into his speeches you might realize that he needs to talk with Ahmadinejad first. He always said that he would talk with all of our enemies. (I hate that term; we just threw out the enemy Bush, everybody else is on our side). He’s goinna’ talk to Mahmoud before he makes any moves on moving out.

Chad:

Now I’ve had it. Why are you doing drugs while your blogging. Your an idiot. I can’t believe you’re a professor at such a great school as the Berkeley School of Law. You can’t be serious about this Ahmadinejad thing.

MoonSong:

Nothing wrong with a little blow, some hemp, and a good Riesling before going to my lecture. The kids identify with me better and ah….yea…. You know Obama is going to legalize everything. So, you have to catch up to the new America; we own it now man, get over it.

Windstar;

That’s it; we own it now and Barack is making everything real for us. It’s hope, change, glory. We have it, we wanted it, I’m sooooo in with Obama. Hey MoonSong, can I hit your lecture today? I want to hear what you’re going to say about Sheehan.

Rowan:

MoonSong you always have the answers. Code Pink should put you in leadership.

Chad:

I’m outta here this is ridiculous.

MoonSong:

Sure Windy, your always welcome in my lectures, in fact anybody out there that is reading this can hang out. If we get enough people we’ll go outside and play friendly Ultimate Frizzby. Bring your shaggy dog Windstar, he can catch some.

Rowan:

So what happens after he meets with Ahmadinejad?

MoonSong:

That’s the question. Obama is always ahead of all of us. He has a master plan. Sit back man it’s all good. We got the change we wanted. I’m doing my thing and that’s cool. Get it down, chill, take a load off……it’s cool.

Rowan:

Thanks I needed that. If I can fly in I may hit that lecture as well. Are you doing more next week.

MoonSong:

Next week, every week, let me know I’ll set one up. I’ll call Maxine Waters and we’ll do a marathon on taking over the oil companies. Obama is on to this and he’ll need her to show him how to do it.

Rowan:

Let me know if you need some support on that. I need some more tax right offs for this year.

MoonSong:

Ooops, I got to move out a’ here. I’m out of Riesling…check back tonight.

Rowan:

You bet!

Windstar:

I’ll bring some to the lecture.

(None of the characters in this fictional exchange are meant to represent any real individual, except Cindy Sheehan. My apologies to Hermann Hesse)